Notes of a Desolate Libra

General Background:
A friend of mine wanted me to just do a general reading for her about the relationship she is currently in. I didn’t have any background aside from that she’s having some sort of trouble in the relationship. Her first question was: should I stay with him or leave him? That yielded a face card, so I asked her to try again with a different question. Then she asked the question: what should I do?

Usually with something that general the cards do not produce very helpful readings. But this spread was one of the most coherent spreads I ever saw. Due to privacy reasons, I shall not reveal any of the background but will only tell the story of the spread.

This is the classic Celtic Cross spread. I asked her to draw an additional card to see find out about the biggest factor influencing this spread (her life). That came out to be the Emperor. Much of this is according to my own interpretation of the cards, so there may be differences with traditional readings of the cards. However, when intuition takes over and lures out the other side of the card, it’s the most interesting to see how they can evolve to fit a situation.

Trouble in Love

Cards + positions:
Situation: 2W – at a standstill, generally stable. For a relationship, then that means the relationship has reached a certain degree of maturity.
Obstacle: QnC (R) – QnC is the most passionate and loving person, but if (R) then she must be feared. She will use every tool in her scheming head to twist your heart and destroy your life.
Best that can be achieved: 4P (R) – no way to maintain stability, and therefore must break out of the mold and seeming stability.
Past: Death (R) – Fear of change, refusal to change
Present: Strength (R) – lack of internal strength to move on
Future: QnS (R) – the QnS is always a intelligent and fair person, but already has the tendency of being rather demanding on herself, when reversed, she is downright harmful to herself and possibly people around her.
True Self: 6C – unable to let go of the past, nostalgia, holding on to past kindness from other people (in this case, the man ).
Environment: High Priestess – a guiding factor, someone (probably female) who holds the key to the heart. In this case I wondered if that represented myself… but that is unclear.
Hopes/fears: Wheel – hoping for a twist of fate to help one out of a situation, except the wheel is fickle, and life can as easily take a turn for the worse as for the better.
Overall: 3W – Take your eyes forward to afar. There is much else in the world. The card also has a sense of entrepreneurship, which could mean that she should concentrate on career/business for now.
Ruling/Influence agent: Emperor – a man with a VERY strong personal and a control freak. The Emperor can be a sweet and comforting figure with his status and maturity, but on the other hand, can easily become a stubborn dictator who is not open to any reasoning except for his own.

Sequences:
2W->3W: if a stable situation comes tumbling down and produces more hurt than benefit, then perhaps it’s time to move out and forward.
QnC (R)->QnS (R): The straight laced and sometimes extreme QnS is no match for the conniving QnC. QnC can do substantial mental and emotional damage to QnS, causing her existing tendencies of self-inflicted pain to magnify. This does NOT bode well for the querent.
Reading Summary (for details see individual cards):
The querent seems to be in a relationship where she is controlled by her overpowering partner and is also facing an unfriendly female power that is doing much damage to her emotionally. She has always been unable to gain a fair share of control in a relationship and generally ends up to be the one who is hurt. Unfortunately, if the QnS (R) holds true, then this trend will continue. However, at this point, she can still break out of the relationship (4P(R)) and look elsewhere for her future. There are alternate futures for her, which she is very fortunate to have, but if she cannot break out of her mold and fall back into the same routine, she will continue to be the one who is hurt.
There are several feminine powers at war/work here, the two Queens, the High Priestess, and Strength. The two queens are both perversed, and Strength is unfortunately suppressed. Only the HP is still upright. The querent should seek help from trustworthy feminine powers around her and not continue to hurt herself and try to handle the situation on her own.

A’s notes: Apart of whether or not this spread fits the situation completely, I was amazed that I was able to get such clearly defined cards. Everything made sense and the cards in their positions flowed so smoothly into each other. I think the querent must had been considering this question for a long time for the cards to form such a clear statement. As for the future of this spread… who knows. In my philosophy, tarot serves to guide, not dictate. I only wish the querent all the best, as I was also once the QnS.

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Question: Will I succeed?

Spread: Diamond + suggestion card

[Strength (R)]

[Death (R)]              [Page of Swords (R)]

[7 of Swords (R)]

Suggestion: Sun

A friend of mine recently was “promoted” to a new position at work but is afraid that she is not up to the task. She is freaking out (has been for about 3 wks) wanted to know if she would succeed. Generally I would say that relying on cards for something that can be achieved through one’s own hard work and persistence is silly (and told her that clearly), but since she had been asking for a while, I just did a reading for her.

Past: Strength R – lack of internal strength
Present: Death R + PgS R – fear of change and lack of motivation and drive
Future: Lack of new ideas and solutions

It was pretty bleak. I know that her own mentality had affected the outcome of the cards and there’s no way to convince her that her future is not in the cards, they are only reflecting that with her current mental state everything will be sure to collapse. All of the cards in the actual spread are reversed, which is unusual but not impossible. Her personality is reflected in all of these cards (as she explained to me). The suggestion card I pulled for her to see what she needs to get out of this situation. She has the possibility of the Sun, but this strength must come from within her. She must see the light and hope in the situation (promotion, new knowledge, appreciation, RAISE) rather than the downside of it (stress, lack of knowledge and ability, fear of failure). Whether or not she can succeed… well, I did what I can (i.e. gave her a good yelling).

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A while ago I posted a reading for my friend Ms. F. I warned her that even if there was romance in her life, it won’t come to fruitation. She got the Lover (R), which means whatever was going to happen, it would be intense, but from the inability to communicate or connect on the most basic levels, no matter how much intensity, it would eventually come to cause her pain and frustration.

There has always been an argument among tarot readers with regard to what tarot does – does it tell the future as is or does it tell you a possible future so that you can have the chance to change it?

I believe that it’s both. One of the teachers that I have been learning from said that: if there is no set future then you wouldn’t be able to read it. That’s logical, no? But the future changes according to changes that happen to us, because we create the future. So therefore, there is a possibility to change it.

Geez, it’s like the chicken or the egg.

Point being, Ms. F went ahead and commenced what ended up to be a very intense but short-lived relationship. There were fundamental differences between the two of them that could not be resolved and in the end, parting was the best way to salvage whatever friendship they had.

Not saying that my readings are very accurate. Occasionally things like this happen and I raise my eyebrows too. But that’s the interesting thing about tarot. Perhaps you would ask whether or not my reading actually led to what happened. Well I can tell you that with her personality (as with many other girls), she would had gone ahead anyway, but with their differences, it really would not had been possible to maintain a balanced relationship. So… it’s both. The relationship itself was written, but it was her personality that created what would be her future. Love is a strange thing. It can be a blessing, or a curse… but I guess in the end, it’s what you learn from its trials that counts…

As for the other part of her readings (i.e. SF vs. NY), she has not yet made a decision but it was previously indicated that something will happen in June that will give her greater clarity. I’m hoping for the best for her.

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I can’t believe I have a tag for Love. But it’s definitely an interesting topic… that’s why people can’t help going back to it in conversations, books, movies, everything. Duh.

Before I left NY, out of boredom I did a reading for myself with both my Osho Zen and Waite decks. The funny/interesting thing is, they both gave me similar answers.

Waite: April – Three of Cups (R)/Six of Swords (R); May – Lovers (R)/Queen of Pentacles (R); June – Knight of Cups/Two of Cups
Osho Zen: April – Going with the flow/Patience; May – Fool/Friendliness; June – Change/Ripeness

For divination I generally use the Waite deck since I’m more familiar with it and also it’s more accurate when it comes to practicality. But the Osho Zen deck is good for personal development.

April is a time of indulgence and acceptance; it is what it is. May is a time of possible relationships but on a general level the conditions are just not right for anything substantial. June is the time of change and actual realizations.

Knight of Cups (new opportunity/charming suitor)/Two of Cups (attraction and forming a bond) and Change/Ripeness (the Osho cards are pretty straightforward) all indicate that there’s a strong chance of romance solidifying. Of course, there’s some traveling that I’m planning to do in June with Lan so it’s possible that this is what the cards are referring to, because that also presents a new opportunity as well as bonding. Though I have learned recently that whichever question you ask, the cards will answer you specifically for that question. So… I think it’s up in the air. I don’t treat it as an experiment, since that would be disrespectful to my cards. However, I do think it amusing that in my annual reading I got the Fool for June. That’s why I *knew* that my move was going to be in June and despite that I tried to move twice in May, it didn’t happen until June.

It’s the most interesting thing to tap into the secrets that life holds for each of us. I believe that there is a strong energy around us, and that’s why I’m agnostic and not atheist. I am reluctant to name that energy, because that would limit/confine it. But I believe in it, and I believe it shall lead me the right way… provided I have the courage to follow.

I don’t care much about having a flourishing love life (lol), but I think having new opportunities and forming bonds with other people is always an interesting and educational thing. I don’t look forward to anything (been very zen, following the advice of my dear monk xD) and it seems my policy of staying clear of any/everything is working! My precious PEACE!

Here’s to new discoveries and new life (only ｉf I choose it to be)!

From left to right: Kn of C (W), 2 of C (W), Change (OZ), Ripeness (OZ)

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Yes, Apple’s slowly becoming my designated Tarot card reading place. Monkey MM has gone through some pretty turbulent times in her life and is hoping to find some solace in a new relationship. I wish the world for her because she’s such a lovely person. Below is the reading for her question.

問題：與“這個”男生有否機會在一起？（愛情維納斯）

你的想法：魔法師（逆）
他的想法：寶劍首牌
你的影響：寶劍皇后
他的影響：聖杯皇后
你們兩人的障礙：聖杯7（逆）
結果：金幣7（逆）
你以後對這事情的看法：權杖9
他以後對這事情的看法：權杖4（逆）

建議牌：聖杯10

這大概是我幫她所開的最好的一個陣吧？以前的牌陣說的事情都是負面的，而且都是叫她小心（而事實上也很多需要小心的事情），但這個，表面看上去還是沒什麽希望，但是原來機會已經存在了，就看你怎麽掌握。

她現在仍然處於一個十分不利的狀態，因爲牽涉的事情太重要，所以影響了她整個都被牽連，不能隨心所欲地做自己想做的事情，也影響了整個陣的結果。她現在最需要做的是揮慧劍斬恩怨，把自己的生活整理好，讓自己能夠有正確的心態來迎接一段新的感情。而他正處於展開一個新行程冒險的途中，應該是職業事業上的一個創舉，而他需要的是一個心靈上的伴侶，可以呵護他照顧他。雖然與女方的現在狀態有點不一樣，但是都是把對方看作一個很重要的異性朋友。處於他們面前的狀態是一些不得不作的決定，而這些決定將會導致兩人面對挑戰。最後或許會有一點力不從心，徒勞無功的感覺，很多努力放進去了，但成功仿佛還是很遠。但是，將來兩人回看的時候。你會明白到這個經驗是一種等待與磨練的考驗，而他會了解到自己的根基尚未穩固，所以暫時不能有任何短期的結果。

幸好的是議牌是充滿喜悅與幸福的聖杯10。無論將來有什麽困難，堅信到最後這會帶給你快樂與美滿的生活，你也就會得到屬於你的家人朋友親人。你與這位男士的關係無論最後演變成如何，都會是符合你所期待的，只要你明白前面的路並不是康莊大道。

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