Love and Marriage II
Everyone has been telling me that once you find that special person, everything just falls into place. You don’t have to put in a lot of effort to make it work and wear yourself down, it just works somehow, and any effort that you put in and any compromises you make won’t seem to be that much of a sacrifice. It will all come very easily.
On my way toward you...
The truth is, the search/wait is for someone worthy of Me. (This “me” could be used by anyone) I know who I am. I know that I am a good person and can bring immense happiness to people. I deserve the best You. This is not quite being self-absorbed. There’s a difference between being self-confident and self-absorbed. The former requires a strong Ego controlled by the Id, and the latter by simply a strong and renewed Ego with a clear and even balance between the Id and the Super-Ego.
Of course, that said, life is just… what it will be. We never know what will happen in our lives, especially when it comes to love and relationships. A friend of mine asked me a while back that if I had to choose between a successful career or a loving husband/family, what would I choose. Without any hesitation I chose a husband (to her extreme surprise). A year ago, it may have been different. Then again, a year ago if I was asked whether or not I would want a child I would have shook my head vehemently. Now, I would answer: with the right person, yes. I can work for and attain a great career, but I can’t ask destiny to grant me the perfect husband (they don’t exist, btw lol). So… in comparison, we are that much more fragile when it comes to relationships.
I was talking to a friend much older and he made the comment: “what can I say. Guys are dumb. They don’t know what they want.” He also said that life is about choices and compromises, and that he wished he were my age again, armed with the knowledge that he has now. And I am thankful that I have already attained that knowledge.
This is from someone in his fifties with a big happy family and has probably gone through 3 successful careers (so far), so there’s something interesting in that comment. Perhaps his unwillingness to compromise, no doubt due to his confidence in himself and his own brilliance had caused him to suffer some damaging loses that he could had prevented had he been willing to compromise. Everyone has a story. Listen up, guys… perhaps you should take a second look at the people around you. You always complain that you don’t meet the right girl… but perhaps You are just not looking the right way. Perhaps You don’t know to look the right way yet.
And so, as my search continues, I go on my merry way to continue to improve myself, so that when/if the right person comes along, I am wise enough to recognize him, brave enough to grab hold to him (much like opportunities), and good enough to keep him. May destiny help me. :)
P.s. Again, YES, I do mean a GUY. I love pretty and smart and cute girls… but not THAT way. >_< T_T X_X
有人說，每到選擇的時候，都是痛苦的。曾經，我的想法也是同樣。我甚至曾經想過，如果沒有選擇的權利，人(我)是否過得更快樂，今天的我卻改變了。我們不能讓所有人快樂，但是我們可以盡量讓自己與身邊的人更快樂。能夠選擇是一種權利，並不是所有人都能擁有的。當不好的事情發生，你可以怨天尤人，也可以嘗試去改變。當你遇上兩個你可以選擇相伴一生的人，你要想的不是如果選擇了其中一個會失去什麽，而是哪一個人更可以與你互相遷就。人生中，總會有一些時候是充滿矛盾與痛苦的。沒有人是完美的。如果你覺得有某兩個人合起來會是完美的人，或許你還沒有學會怎樣去愛。因爲愛不但是那人可以為你付出什麽，更是你能不能去包容那個人的缺點，相反亦然。
一個人，最重要的不是在今天想著以後沒有遺憾，而是今天沒有遺憾。做人做事，要對得起天地良心。如果你做每一件事情都是正面積極地去做，或許就不會有什麽失去的遺憾。
